Article by: Paul Hudson •
Photo Courtesy: Jessica Janae Photography
Let’s be honest… it’s not difficult for women to find sex.
You could literally walk down the street, ask if anyone wants to go to bed with you, and you’ll have several hands go up – if not all. Hell, you’ll probably even have a few women raise their hands as well.
The harder part for women is finding someone to keep around for the long run. Finding a man for the night is easy. Finding a man for a year is much more difficult. Finding a man for life is… well, rare.
It’s impossible to tell if that someone is the right someone for life, but you can tell if he’s worth keeping around for a while. You can also tell when he isn’t worth more than a few goes in between the sheets. Here are a few signals to watch out for:
He’s cute, but he isn’t exactly your type – keep him for the night.
There are plenty of beautiful people in the world, and a surprisingly large amount of them will be more than willing to sleep with you. Yet, finding the one who looks just right – I think you know what I mean – isn’t easy.
Finding someone who looks like home is rare, but finding someone who looks like a good time in a hotel room is much easier
You managed to have a real conversation – maybe keep him around for a bit longer.
I’ve spoken with a lot of women, but I’ve had very few actual conversations. I don’t consider small talk a real convo; you shouldn’t either.
A man worth keeping around is a man who helps you explore your own beliefs and consciousness through the words the two of you share. If the conversations feel recycled then maybe just get him into bed instead.
He makes you laugh without even trying – keep him for life.
There is little in the world that feels better than laughter. It makes you feel great instantly and has lasting effects for the long run – what better medicine could you ask for?
He doesn’t have to be a comedian, but having a similar sense of humor is a big plus if you’re thinking about bringing him onboard for a while.
If thinking about him doesn’t bring a smile to your face — he’s only good for a night.
This isn’t to say that you have to be in love with the guy, but if not even his performance in the sack can make you smile then there is no point in continuing, is there?
You can tell he doesn’t really care about you — he’s a one-nighter.
Some guys are good at pretending to care, but most won’t bother. You, though, have to be able to tell the difference under every circumstance. It’s when you confuse the way a man feels about you that you begin to make poor decisions.
If you know he doesn’t really care then don’t fool yourself into believing he does. Even guys like to project their own feelings when they find someone they really like.
He’d rather watch TV than have sex – maybe don’t even keep him for the night and just throw him out right away.
If he would rather stare at a TV than your arched back then he isn’t really good for much. Hell, he isn’t much of a man at all really.
He’s either still a boy or you just don’t have the right chemistry – so move on to the next one.
If he’s bought you something for no reason – even if it’s something seemingly insignificant – you should consider keeping him around.
There are men who will shower women with gifts just to get in their pants, so be careful. But when a guy buys you something because he couldn’t stop thinking about you, you’ll know.
The more personal the gift the more worthwhile he is.
If he seems to know you better than you know yourself — you should definitely keep him around for at least a little bit longer.
It’s hard to find someone who looks at you and sees you clear as day. It does happen, but rarely. And when it does, you should keep that person around for as long as possible.
He will help you learn about yourself and help you become the person you wish to be. He’s probably the most valuable person you can have in your life.
He doesn’t respect you – get rid of him as soon as you possibly can.
…Or just keep him around if he’s a good lay. A girl’s gotta get it in when she needs to just as well. He may be a prick, but if he pushes all the right buttons then maybe you can keep him around as a plaything for some time.
Technically, you’re using him just as much as he’s using you… so fair is fair.
If he listens to you more than he talks — he may be the man for you.
Guys like to talk to fill in the gaps, but when they feel that there are no gaps to fill, they listen. Every man is capable of listening. However, most men will not – pardon my language – give a rat’s ass about anything that comes out of your mouth.
If he hangs on your every word then he clearly cares about you, and not just the physical you, but the mental you. Someone who is fascinated by your mind is definitely worth the risk.
If he’s not trustworthy — don’t give too much of yourself to him.
If you have feelings for him then your impulse will be to trust him, but you may want to reconsider. You have to analyze him and his actions towards you objectively and figure out how much of yourself you should be willing to give him, how much you’re willing to open up.
Most people you shouldn’t trust with your heart and even those you can, you should be wary of. Opening up too much too soon can do just as much damage.