Reposted from: http://elitedaily.com/life/toxic-people-new-year/879975/

Written by: Paul Hudson in Wellness

Can you believe that it’s already December? This year has flown by in the blink of an eye and we’re on the verge of yet another year — a year full of possibility.

What you will accomplish next year greatly depends on the people you surround yourself with. Or, in other words, it greatly depends on which people you decide not to surround yourself with.

When bringing in the new year, be sure not to bring all your garbage with you. Leave these toxic individuals in 2014; you’ll feel much lighter, allowing you to get a great running start on the year to come.

1. The people who make your life more stressful.

Stress isn’t necessarily a bad thing — in fact, it’s what you make it out to be. If you believe stress is bad for you, then it will be bad for you. If you use stress as the motivator it is, to motivate you to act, then stress can actually be rather healthy.

However, you should aim to only be stressed by situations and not by people. If you have people in your life who are constantly managing to stress you out, that’s your mind telling you — and trying to motivate you — to remove them from your life.

Life is stressful as it is. You don’t need someone making it more so.

Reposted from: https://afternarcissisticabuse.wordpress.com/

By: ANA – After Narcissistic Abuse

I Love You! These are the most abusive and hideous words that the Narcissist uses to abuse their targets/victims!

The effects of emotional or psychological abuse falls under the category of ‘traumatic shock’ a well-known and accepted theory. The definition defines it as this; any event that destroys our internalized set of assumptions patterns and understandings that we all use to operate in the world every day. It is saying that we become traumatized by one extreme action or a set of actions that come into our lives. These actions are usually associated with something we have never experienced before personally and very negative that has impacted and jolted our reality.

Reposted from: http://psychcentral.com/lib/the-5-stages-of-loss-and-grief/000617

Written  By Julie Axelrod

The stages of mourning and grief are universal and are experienced by people from all walks of life. Mourning occurs in response to an individual’s own terminal illness, the loss of a close relationship, or to the death of a valued being, human or animal. There are five stages of normal grief that were first proposed by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross in her 1969 book “On Death and Dying.”

In our bereavement, we spend different lengths of time working through each step and express each stage with different levels of intensity. The five stages do not necessarily occur in any specific order. We often move between stages before achieving a more peaceful acceptance of death. Many of us are not afforded the luxury of time required to achieve this final stage of grief.

The death of your loved one might inspire you to evaluate your own feelings of mortality. Throughout each stage, a common thread of hope emerges: As long as there is life, there is hope. As long as there is hope, there is life.

Many people do not experience the stages in the order listed below, which is okay. The key to understanding the stages is not to feel like you must go through every one of them, in precise order. Instead, it’s more helpful to look at them as guides in the grieving process — it helps you understand and put into context where you are.

All, keep in mind — all people grieve differently. Some people will wear their emotions on their sleeve and be outwardly emotional. Others will experience their grief more internally, and may not cry. You should try and not judge how a person experiences their grief, as each person will experience it differently.

1. Denial and Isolation

The first reaction to learning of terminal illness or death of a cherished loved one is to deny the reality of the situation. It is a normal reaction to rationalize overwhelming emotions. It is a defense mechanism that buffers the immediate shock. We block out the words and hide from the facts. This is a temporary response that carries us through the first wave of pain.

Reposted from: http://thedynamicdivorcee.blogspot.com/2013/12/5-very-surprising-cures-for-holiday.html

Written by Rosetta

During my separation, divorce, and for years following the divorce, the holiday season was just an awful time for me.

The agony started right after Halloween, as Christmas decorations started to appear in stores, and Christmas music began to blast everywhere I went.

I truly came to understand the expression “gut-wrenching.”  I felt physically ill, and had to resort to deep breathing and sunglasses to camouflage the tears.

I’d talk to myself, silently (and sometimes not so silently) in public.  I’d say to myself, “It’s okay, it’s okay,hang in there.  Breathe.  Thank god for sunglasses:  No one can see you crying.  Just hang in there a few more minutes.  You’ll be back in the car soon and then you can let it all out . . . .”

Somehow, the season would have me rehashing all sorts of old memories:
What I should have done, how I should have known better, what I did right, what I couldn’t possibly have known . . . on and on and on.